Joe, Joe. Listen up Joe: why do you think so much?

<<JOE: Not often I'm accused of that.

<<UNI: In one paragraph she calls you an idiot and says you over think.

Is it to try to glorify your stuff? To put yourself on level with other people’s work?

<<JOE: You got me, I just love going to other people's websites and blogs to tell them how great I think I am. I make it my life's work to find every obscure web site and comic and rip them to shreads.

I’m usually humble!

Heck, I just do a stupid game comic and it doesn’t make me awesome one bit. But I have to say: Stage Select ROCKS YOUR COMIC!

<<JOE: The definitive, thoroughly researched, non-partisan, and mature review.

Which brings me to what triggered this blog post (finally)…

<<ALL: FINALLY!!!

Subject: This has had me baffled for years
Date: Sun, 16 Jul 2006 19:12:44 -0700
Why do web cartoonists have such a bad attitude towards their fans?

I honor my readers. Each one of you, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I sincerely appreciate your coming, I sincerely hope you appreciate what you see. Stage Select is yours to laugh at to your heart’s content and I humbly hope you will enjoy your stay. Love you guys!

<<JOE: That sure showed me, I was so wrong in doubting her.

<<JD: Doesn't she really ever say anything good about her fans?

<<JOE: Only when they pay her.

(And really people. Really. I have to repeat myself here. THANK YOU for the donations! Now it's up to a WHOPPING $304.54! I don't know what to say. You guys are the most awesome people on earth.)

But losers like you, Joe, who sees big prophecies in vagueness, deserve to be laughed at and humiliated. I SALUTE YOU, !

<<JOE: And now for the collective heads of knuckle.

Ramzal Says:
July 17th, 2006 at 2:35 pm

“You dont have better things to do with your time if you’re going about this.”

Sure, you’re in the military...WHAT IS THE POINT OF MENTIONING IT WHEN IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ANYTHING?!

<<UNI: So what was that Bible Study about earlier?

Cyril Says:
July 17th, 2006 at 5:05 pm

Oookay… That’s funky-dunky. I think he may have watched “V for Vendetta” a couple times too many… If that is even possible, I loved that movie.

<<JOE: Oookay...I have never watched V for Vendetta. So since I have never watched this movie, I have seen it too many times. TRhis idiot loves it and has never seen it too many times.

<<UNI: Unknown fact: V also stands for vacant, vacuous, vacuum, vagrant, vapid, vapor, void, vomit; boy, who knew dictionaries could be so much fun.

Anyway, Joe is being a retard, truly, with the coincidences.

I am in a band called Divided Roads, and they had a song written called “What We Deserve” and it was good. It just so happens that is uses the same chord progression in it’s chorus as a song I wrote around the same time called “Mission.” It happens. Chord Progressions, and even melodies are constantly “stolen” from people.

<<JOE: Must be using the Mr. Brittany Spears business model. That work so well for him.

<<UNI: I've noticed how these people have to drone on and on about irrelevant stuff. Like anybody really cares.

<<JOE: This guy purports to be a musician and yet knows absolutely nothing about his craft. He thinks that artists don't mind having their chords "stolen?" This idiot needs to have a long talk with Ray Parker Jr.

<<JD: Even Weird Al has to ask permission.

Maneko Says:
July 17th, 2006 at 5:33 pm

<<JOE: Heckle has to put in his two-bits.

<<JD: Heckle?

<<JOE: That's what I call those two: Heckle and Jeckle who think they're cartoonists.

<<UNI: Naw, come up with something else. How about Dumb and Dumber?

<<JD: Two Stupid Dogs?

<<UNI: Itchy and Scratchy?

<<JD: Ren and Stimpy?

<<JOE: Bingo!

<<UNI: You never like my ideas.

Wahahaha! Once again, Joe Pullin gets the smacktarded award.

<<JOE: Let's start throwing around personal insults instead of debating the issues.

Yeah, I had my share of funny moments with that guy, too. Look at this, and Iris’s tale will make even MORE sense.

<<JD: So A guy that constantly reminds us that English is not his first languish is going to help all this make sense?

Sent : Tuesday, November 29, 2005

The story on this comic is that two of my main charcters are getting married and left the details up to the bride’s mother, Penelope Bell. She has made the theme Redneck. I have based this particulr series on an old Johnboy and Billy skit titled “Top Ten Signs You are at a Redneck Wedding.” I made this comic to showcase some of the characters that appeared only one or two times this season. Also so I think these jokes work better together rather than spread out amoung a dozen different comics.

So that there is no confusion as to who exactly is this comic, from left to right: Nurse Washu, Dr. Anderson, MRE, Dr. Mario, Usagi, Alarmclockman X, Scrapper, Forte, Dr. Light, Kerrigan, Enker, Jimmy, Coyote Girl, Stanley Ingle, and Miranda Fitel.

Translation? HAY U DUN KNOW ME ‘N U DUN KNOU WHUT AM ME TLAKING ABOUT BUT ME WANNA HAEV UR STUFF CUZ MY OWN STUFF SUCKS N’ ME WANNA B COOL WITHUT WORKING PLS GIMME UR STUFF.

<<JOE: Help me out, what did he say I said? Looks absolutely nothing what I said.

<<UNI: Maybe he needs a new translation plug-in for Word.

and yeah, evidently he didn’t sent me a bloody thing.

<<JOE: Evidently he doesn't know how to download attachments in Hotmail.

Of course, since I don’t have the power to read minds or to understand half-assed

<<JD: We never do anything "half-assed."

<<UNI: We're fully assed.

conversations sent by a guy who talked to me as if we were old friends

<<JOE: I would say colleague that I once respected.

So yeah, my answer to him was something like: “Sorry, but the answer is no. You can’t have my sprites, thanks anyways.”

<<JOE: "MY HOLE KAST!? HOW DARE YU! I DOESN'T NO YU!"

And after a while, he pops out from nowhere, with a new message:

Sent : Wednesday, November 16, 2005

<<JOE: I am no expert on the various South American cultures, but I believe that most use the same calendar that North America uses.

“Hi me did the same thing as you so i’m better,

<<JOE: I said that?

I have lesbian friends cus I’m cool

<<JOE: So it's perfectly alright for her to brag on and on about being "friends" with him.

and my megaman sprites are hot even if they look like crap

<<UNI: Is there some sort of worm hole that he lives in that mistranslates people's emails?

so u are RONG amd me am rite,

<<JD: New from Advanced Micro Devices: The RONG drive. It protects your most valuable information by garbling it.

lol I’m still better than U read ma comix plstnkxBAI.”

<<UNI: Grimlock would be unable to understand this.

So evidently, after this, he went to Iris to rant

<<JOE: This is the best he's got? Lie about what I do? Accuse me of doing what he does?

because everyone were stealing his cool ideas.

<<JD: Not:  1-used as a function word to make negative a group of words or a word 2 — used as a function word to stand for the negative of a preceding group of words *is sometimes hard to see and sometimes not*

<<UNI: Depends on what your definition of "is" is.

Oh, and he claims to be a soldier... Yeah. Totally beliveable.

<<JOE: I wonder if he has ever had to dig a "cat hole?"

I am going to stop right now. I can only take so much at once before I am on the floor laughing my whole ass off at these "people."

I will, sometime in the far off future, finish this.

If dissatisfied please return unused portion for a fool refund.

Offer void in Quebec.